The Dark Side of Awakening
As humans, whether we like it or not, we are in a constant state of spiritual awakening. We are constantly growing, learning, and nourishing our inner-being by continuing to have life-experiences.
Even when we seem to be in a spiritual retrograde - or suffer from spiritual fatigue - we are on a path of awakening. Even when we've felt a previous awakening within ourselves, the journey continues.
We travel from one awakening to the next - each revealing new secrets about who we are and why we are here. Sometimes, we even return to a previous awakening. There, we learn pieces of the lessons we didn't learn the first time through. And with each awakening, we grow closer to the convergence of our mind, body, and spirit in what is sure to be the ultimate state of being.
The Painful Truth
One fact that often goes without mention is that "Awakening" is a destructive process. On the path to enlightenment, we must confront, analyze, and eventually deconstruct our previous beliefs and notions about "who we are" and "why we are here". We must let go of our preconceived notions of our inner-self and confront our most destructive enemy, Ego. We must shed it from us like a snake sheds it's skin.
Shedding of the Ego is not easy. In fact, it is often quite painful and destructive. During this time, one can destroy their goals, dreams, and relationships. One can destroy their careers, material possessions, and lose financial abundance. Sometimes we even destroy ourselves.
Why?
Ego
Our Ego is our false interpretation of self. It serves as a protector of sorts - albeit misguided. It tries to protect us from whatever it perceives as harm. It tries desperately to hide our weaknesses and compensate for our fears, even if that means causing fear and self-sabotage. And when we are faced with a change, particularly one on the soul-level, Ego often responds in ugly and terrible ways.
Regardless of the method used to attain self knowledge and enlightenment, the ego will always wait in silence. And when it thinks that the inner-being is awakening, it fears losing it's own power. Then it steps out of the shadows and ambushes the mind with its own self-important ideas of what spiritually is all about. It only cares for its own gain. The ego always wants to be in charge of our thoughts and actions and it will go to any length to keep that control.
Even when we have had previous awakenings, and we are consciously aware that ego is waiting in the shadows, it still has the ability to seduce us back into it's lair, comforting us with lies, and creating confusion within.
This confusion is just the ego's desirability of its own creation. Mental clutter and chaos is the smokescreen ego uses to avoid self-confrontation. It is this confusion that forms layers - like an onion - between the ego's desires and the spirit's needs. All these layers must be stripped away before any true enlightenment can be found, and as each layer of the ego's desires are peeled away, there is a new awakening - and with it - a new battle ensues.
These awakenings can often be painful and hard to master because the ego wants to be in charge of its own destiny. Our spirit wants its knowledge to be shared. but when ego tries to take command, its only goal becomes "recognition"... so it can hold onto the status of its own creation.
The truth is this... No one can find the truth of our own inner-being without facing up to our own ego and accepting that there will be a dark side to the awakening. But in the end, the greater understanding of our higher-self and "why we are here" is very much worth the journey.
- The Boatman
*This article originally appeared in Your Perfect Universe Online Magazine. All rights reserved by Joe "The Boatman" Vulgamore.
Regardless of the method used to attain self knowledge and enlightenment, the ego will always wait in silence. And when it thinks that the inner-being is awakening, it fears losing it's own power. Then it steps out of the shadows and ambushes the mind with its own self-important ideas of what spiritually is all about. It only cares for its own gain. The ego always wants to be in charge of our thoughts and actions and it will go to any length to keep that control.
Even when we have had previous awakenings, and we are consciously aware that ego is waiting in the shadows, it still has the ability to seduce us back into it's lair, comforting us with lies, and creating confusion within.
This confusion is just the ego's desirability of its own creation. Mental clutter and chaos is the smokescreen ego uses to avoid self-confrontation. It is this confusion that forms layers - like an onion - between the ego's desires and the spirit's needs. All these layers must be stripped away before any true enlightenment can be found, and as each layer of the ego's desires are peeled away, there is a new awakening - and with it - a new battle ensues.
These awakenings can often be painful and hard to master because the ego wants to be in charge of its own destiny. Our spirit wants its knowledge to be shared. but when ego tries to take command, its only goal becomes "recognition"... so it can hold onto the status of its own creation.
The truth is this... No one can find the truth of our own inner-being without facing up to our own ego and accepting that there will be a dark side to the awakening. But in the end, the greater understanding of our higher-self and "why we are here" is very much worth the journey.
- The Boatman
*This article originally appeared in Your Perfect Universe Online Magazine. All rights reserved by Joe "The Boatman" Vulgamore.
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